Sunday, January 31, 2010

No Hyperlinks. I'm feeling lazy.

Apparently no title, either!

Proving herself to be the Smartest Woman in the World, Housewife Savant has done it again.

She predicted to me that now that Beloved is back my life may become too busy for a time--too busy to blog. I hate to admit it, but that woman was right. And has great hair. ; )

So, I'll just tell you what happened with Shannon after Beloved broke it off.

The day after Beloved came home I got on facebook to post something prodigal son-y, figuring that those who knew what was going on would understand and those who didn't would go, 'Huh?' and not give it another thought.

While I was on I noticed that I had a message. Now, I knew it was from her before I clicked on that little Messages tab/doohickey (sp?). But I opened it and sure enough she had written me a message. Now, for those who are on facebook, you know that you only see a line or so from that message and then you have to click on the message to open it and read the whole text.

Well, it said (all that I could see): "Well, I guess you won. Have a great life. Oh and let me just say 3"--but that is where it cut off. And I knew I wasn't ready to open it up and read what she had to say. I figured it wasn't "3 super-sweet things Beloved said about you" or "3 of my favorite kinds of ice-cream, just FYI!" So I let it sit.

I will say that I knew it was not pleasant. I knew she sent it just to mess with me, so I ignored it. For a while. Ok, a week or two. Yeah. I'm not so smart, sometimes.

I won't go into what it said, but it messed me up for a few days.

Added to that Beloved opened his email and had an email from her. He told me and said I could just delete it. I read it. Of course. Then we blocked all of her email addresses.

It had to do with cancelling flights and sending stuff that he had left behind back to him and him mailing back the autographed Steve Young jersey she had bought for him. She had told him to just burn it, but he felt like it was expensive and he didn't want to keep it and didn't want to just give it away so I mailed it to her. I gotta tell you, I felt bad sending that jersey away. He has always wanted one, and we could never afford one. Anyway....

She told him that she had gone back to her husband and they are 'putting God first in [their] lives' with the addendum, "so long as he doesn't drink anymore", which I felt was her little way of reminding him of how her husband 'was so bad to her' (which may not in fact be true). Just a feeling I had. And then she asked how things are going with me and him and that she'd really love to hear from him. That she was sorry for being angry and that she was just hurt, and what is going on with him? How is he doing? Blah blah blah. I felt like she was trying to reopen a conversation between them.

Then we got a box from her. Beloved didn't want to deal with it, so I went out to the garage and handled it all. I won't go into everything that was in there. (All of it went to Goodwill or the trash, by the way, except his yearbook and some football cards.) There was a long letter in there saying that she will always love him and that they are soul mates and that she wants him to call her in a year or two to tell her how things are going (Yeah, right.) and that she was really angry at first, but then she called her husband right after hanging up with Beloved because God told her to and they went on their first date and she's so happy with him and then she reminds Beloved that he always knows how to reach her if he wants to, blah blah blah. I felt like it was fake for some reason.

It was. Because a few weeks ago someone I know who also knows Shannon said that she had just recently gone back to her husband. Which supports my hunch that she was writing those things hoping Beloved would say, "Wait...I don't like the idea of you with him..." and come right back.

So there is a little bit of catch-up. I thought it'd be fun to think of some endings for that sentence: "Oh and let me just say 3..."

Got an idea? Post it in the comments.


And, my I'mNotGivingUpOnYou yahoo friend: I am so sorry I haven't ever gotten back to you. I think about you all the time. Pretty much every day. I think, "R did this. It may not be the same situation, but R did this. I can do it, too." So, thank you, my friend. I don't know you, but I really am thankful you wrote me. I'd like to say I'll email you back soon, but I don't know when that will be. But I'll post here to let you Ok. That was a long side message.


Eva Gallant said...

I'm glad for you that things seem to be working out.

Michelle said...

thanks for the update. You're fantastic.

wonder woman said...

Glad to hear from you. Glad you're busy.

"Let me just say 3 things I think you need to hear. 1) I couldn't have done what you did. If my husband had done that, I'd kick him out and never look back. You are a bigger woman than I. (And no, I'm not calling you fat.) 2) Before, I didn't understand why he loved you. Now, I think I'm beginning to understand. And I'm envious. 3) I'm sorry for the heartache I caused you and particularly your children."

Probably not what it said, but it'd be nice. :o)

MiMi said...

Let me just say 3 words, I'M SO JEALOUS. LOL. :)

Kerri said...

I liked your 3 favorite kinds of ice cream... That made me laugh. Otherwise, I think Wonder Woman nailed it.

Anonymous said...

Oh, and let me just say 3 things...
1. I am selfish
2. I have no morals
3. I need therapy, quick.

I am intrigued by your blog, yet saddened because my husband did this to me, and it is still fresh in my mind.

-a new reader

K a b l o o e y said...

You handled all that about as well as someone could have. Your husband is still SO lucky to have you. Seriously; you're amazingly smart, strong and decent. Glad to hear from you. Don't worry about us, just post when you can.

Anonymous said...

Boy, she really is quite manipulative, selfish, amoral and with the bravado of an animal in heat. I could think of a few other choice words that, through her actions, would describe her but maybe I'll just send them to her telepathicly. Opps, I could never reach her brain waves, though. I could never be that kind of person. Thank heavens very, very few of us are her kind of person.

ME (igf)

Anonymous said...

Wow, you guys are all funny...You seem to blame just her! Ha, he's a grown man and is capable of making his own decisions...Do you really think that she is THAT manipulative? I have been through something very similar Gigi (of course I wasn't as strong as you and chose not to stick it out, I got very tired of the feelings I carried around day after day)and I know everyone's pain is different but bashing her doesn't erase the decisions Beloved made. Sounds like you might be angry at the wrong person...I do wish you luck in your healing but displaced anger is not a very healthy thing to practice!
I have to admit I am curious about the 3....but, I respect your privacy...

Anonymous said...

Well, she did ask us what we thought the three things were.
I could think of things for her husband, oh boy, could I.

Reminds me of this video...

I felt like that when my husband cheated on me.

-new reader (again)

Anonymous said...

That video is great! Wonder if Gigi will end up shooting him? haha By the way, she has a great voice!

Valerie said...

Girl I would have so read it and not have waited two weeks. lol Glad things are going well.

Anonymous said...

So, GiGi..... Where are you? Where have you been? Are we ever going to find out the three words? Hummm! You are a tease! :)

Anonymous said...

Ice Cream:

Those are my favorite! Hope all is well Gigi...

RoryPaints said...

OK, so I'm a terrible BFF, BUUUUUUUUUUUUTTTT, I did just read and catch up on everything and I have to say that once again, you are awesome and amazing! We love you guys and per our late night discussions over the summer (that was so much fun, btw), I know that YOU knew it would be hard whether or not he came back, but I think this way is more likely easier than if he DIDN't come know what I mean?

Anyway, I can only imagine how much hurt you still have, but I think you're right. I think it WILL be overcome. You're already heads and shoulders above most of us "normal" women when it comes to dealing with relationships and being unconditionally loving...which I have always, always, always admired about you. I am starting to realize that with faith ALL things really ARE possible. You are a testament to that!

Love yoU!

Donna said...

hi, I just wanted to say that I love your blog. I am not sure if you ever check back on it or if you will ever see this comment. I am going through the emotional abuse as you call it after finding out my husband was having an affair with my best friend 3 weeks ago. I am trying tobe Christ like and treat it as such. I have forgiven both parties and my husband wants to work on things in our marriage. He won't sleep in the bed with me, says he doesn't love me, he loves the other woman, but wants to learn to love me again. It is so hard and i struggle on a day to day basis trying to figure out how he will be with me. All I want is for him to take me in his arms and say I Love You! not going to happen for a while I know, and I hope it will happen. Anyway, thank you for this blog, it has helped me so much. Donna Watson
* I hope your marriage is better years later.

Anonymous said...

I just stumbled onto your blog. I completely understand everything you have been going through. I read one of your posts about Sundays. I couldn't agree more. I struggle every.single.solitary.Sunday. I HATE Sundays because of the "families can be together forever". I hate Sundays because I know the pain of what it feels like NOT have a worthy priesthood holder in the home.

This whole process SUCKS. The hurt. The pain. The wanting to punch your husband in the face every time he walks into the room. I thought I could power through the grief process. Not so much. It has been 7 months and I have my up days and down days.

I always said if my husband ever cheated on me, he could pack his bags and that would be the end of it. But then when that moment came, I just couldn't kick him out. He is in therapy. I am in therapy. He has done everything plus some to fight for our marriage. I am numb. And I still can't envision a future with us together. I just haven't taken that step to either separate or divorce. I am still waiting for the dust to settle before I make any huge decisions that will alter the rest of my life . . . and the lives of my children.